Rava said: “This matter was told me by the child who caused the deterioration of his mother’s ways” (Bava Batra 9a)

Why did they call him “the child who caused the deterioration of his mother’s ways?” R. Ahadvoy bar Ami asked R. Sheshet: “How do we know that a metzora during the days of his counting (the seven day purification process after he no longer has a blemish) is metamei adam? He said to him: “Since he is metamei garments, he is metamei a person. [In the ensuing section, R. Ahadvoy refutes R. Sheshet’s repeated attempts to derive metamei adam from metamei begadim]. He (R. Ahadvoy) directed a joke towards R. Sheshet. R. Sheshet became depressed. R. Ahadvoy became mute and had difficulties with his learning. His mother came and cried before him (asking for mercy and forgiveness). She cried and cried but he paid no attention to her. She said to him: “See these breasts that you nursed from.” He (R. Sheshet) prayed for mercy and he (R. Ahadvoy) was cured. (Bava Batra 9b)

Whose mother came asking for mercy? Rashi explains that it was R. Sheshet’s mother. Though R. Ahadvoy was suffering, not her son, she did not want another person to experience anguish due to an incident involving her son. Rava referred to R. Sheshet as “the child caused the deterioration of his mother’s ways” because his initial indifference to his mother’s pleading led her to expose her breasts.
Rabben Nissim disagrees arguing that Rava would never refer to R. Sheshet as “a child.” After all, Rava was a generation after R. Sheshet and R. Sheshet was a figure of great stature. He asserts that “the child” must refer to R. Ahadvoy. R. Ahadvoy’s mother was distraught about her son’s condition and she came to R. Sheshet to beg for forgiveness. Her son caused her unusual behavior because his actions towards R. Sheshet precipitated the whole affair.

According to this version, R. Ahadvoy’s mother had been the wet nurse of R. Sheshet. She asked for mercy on the basis of her having sustained him in childhood. Why was R. Sheshet resistant to the mother’s pleading? Chatam Sofer explains that R. Shshet thought protecting the honor of Torah was more important. The correctness of this position depends upon how we balance the ideals of honoring the Torah with mercy or with honoring parents (if the gemara refers to R. Sheshet’s mother).

Hatam Sofer adds a profound reading of the mother’s dramatic behavior. It seems odd that she would expose herself and mention her breasts in order to influence R. Sheshet towards mercy. R. Sofer contends that such action carries symbolic import. Chazal apply the image of a nursing mother to teachers providing spiritual nourishment to their students. This mother wanted R. Sheshet to think about his relationship with R. Ahadvoy, his student, as a mother relates to her child.

A mother not only feeds her children; she constantly desires to improve their welfare. Even when she occasionally rebukes or punishes them, her love and mercy always remain dominant. The mother suggested that a teacher must function in a parallel fashion. R. Sheshet was justifiably angry but he originally lacked the parental mercy so important in these kinds of relationships. The mother’s radical behavior moved R. Sheshet to this realization.